It’s good to be complimentary

Ever since the Scottish Independence Referendum, through the Brexit vote and now with another election looming in the UK, my Facebook feed has been filled with people ranting and making angry comments about all manner of stuff.  Not just about politics, but it seems like nearly all walks of life and all situations are represented in these rants. There seems to be so much rage, but why?  

So much of it seems to be about First World problems. You know what I mean – too much salt on their chips, not being able to find the right colour tie to go with their shirt, not being able to find the exact flavour of coffee they want in a store with 25 different types on sale.  
In the grand scheme of things, with poverty, hunger, lack of safe drinking water, homelessness etc globally, why are people sweating the inconsequential stuff, and why are they getting so angry about it? 

I’ve just come back from a trip to the Middle East, and one thing that struck me was that, irrespective of who I was meeting, people were unfailingly complimentary before the meeting ended: even the staff in hotels, car drivers etc were friendly and polite to a level which is unusual here in the UK – in my experience at least. What was odd – and bad I think – was that I found it so difficult to be as polite in return, particularly at the end of meetings. In the UK, behaviour like that is seen as “over the top”, “too much”, “sycophantic” or plain “ass-kissing”.

But here’s the thing. Why is that? What’s so wrong with telling people how much you’ve enjoyed spending time with them, how you appreciate them taking time out of their day to talk to you?  I’m getting better at it, but will no doubt have to remember not to do it here in the UK as it’s “just not done”.   Isn’t it better than calling people out on things like their looks, their fashion sense, their choice of music – whatever doesn’t meet your standards.  
A little kindness costs nothing, and it makes the giver and receiver of those words feel better. Surely that’s a really good thing? 

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